Our Story
(Abbreviated Version)
Keven & Marianne Card
© 2009 Keven & Marianne Card
Two Worlds
We met in a dance club on an island in the south Pacific called Guam. I had been stationed there in the Marines for about a year before that fateful night. The story of what happened in the club is featured in our book “Forever Newlyweds” so I won’t ruin the surprise by telling you what happened here. However, As if it were a movie that I could watch at any time; that night was a night that both, scared me out of my mind and made me want what I had vowed to myself I would never look for and that was love. Both these feelings happened at the same time. It was an unusual feeling for me because I believed that I was unlovable and because of that belief, I had vowed never to get into a serious relationship, but Marianne had found away around all the barriers that I had put up for myself and I immediately felt an unyielding connection.
For her that night was just as significant, all of her friends had boyfriends and she was the only one who had gone to the club stag. Secretly she had prayed that she would meet someone and all I can say is that when I went into the club that night it was as if she was the only girl in the club. For her it was as if we had already known each other for years and were almost good friends. We parted that night with a respectful but passionate kiss which was not my typical M.O.
Within two months of dating I couldn’t figure it out but I knew I wanted to marry her and so at my friend’s house, on leave, I proposed to her. I got out of the Marines, flew immediately back to Guam and started to set up for our lives together. Marianne had no idea the struggle she had gotten herself into.
These reason I felt unlovable was because of my past, you know that thing that we all look at to remind ourselves of why we are the person we’ve become and quite simply I wanted to forget all of mine. You see, I was extremely screwed up at that particular time of my life. I went into the Marine Corps with the intention of giving my life for my country. I hated myself so badly and believed so deeply that I was a useless human being. I was a trouble maker growing up and my parents would react poorly, reminding me of what I already thought I knew which was that I would be a life wasted. As a teen, I would cut myself in order to hold back my anger from spinning out of control. Needless to say I had turned away from God and ran as far away as possible.
When I was asked to look back to write a testimony, there was one event in my life that seemed to shape my childhood. At eight years old, my step-brother, who was thirteen at the time, had moved in with us and we shared my room. Within a few days he asked me if I wanted to play a game but he told me that it was a game that we couldn’t tell anyone about and I unwittingly said yes. Of course, in my shame I never told anyone even after he’d left. He had actually convinced me that I would be punished by my parents for what he had done. Even now I have butterflies in my stomach and I’m shaking having to think about this, but I believe it needs to be shared because there are others out there who been molested and need some hope.
That was the starting point of all twisted and evil things that I had done. It started as just a pain that I couldn’t share with anyone and then it evolved into a raging anger that begged for death. When I first met Marianne I thought I could contain it but my anger was not so easily put into a box.
Marianne on the other hand had a very close relationship with her Mom. She grew up knowing she was loved although for most of her life her Dad had to work in Guam while her and her Mom lived in the Philippines. She struggled some when they moved to Guam to live with her dad because she simply didn’t know him but once she got to know him she learned to accept and love him too.
Everything was going great for the first couple of years. I was able to control my anger somewhat and Marianne was incredibly patient but after that my anger and self-destructive nature started to come to the surface and by the fourth year we were on the verge of divorce. We decided to separate; I moved in with a friend and she stayed in our apartment. Exactly, seven days into our being apart; I was lying in my bed and a truth hit me so hard, I started to tear up. What happened to me in the past was dictating what was happening to me at that moment and I didn’t want to go the rest of my life feeling the pain of the wrongs that were done to me and that I had done. In that one moment I let it go, all of it and I decided that I would never look back. What I realize now is that I forgave everyone and most importantly myself.
I called Marianne and told her I had to see her and talk to her and thank God she agreed to meet with me. That day was to turning point of our marriage and our lives together. We agreed that day that we would be happy together no matter what happened in our lives. We made a commitment to take life on together and to never look back at the mistakes that we made but we would press on together. We made a commitment that we would do everything together and all I can say is that it has paid off in a huge way.
I love my wife more today than I ever have before and each day we grow closer together. We are best friends and lovers and we spend our time trying to do for each other and we never focus on what we can get from each other. We’ve become one as it’s described in the Bible and we are completely inseparable.
The reason for the title of our book is because time and again people have confused us for newlyweds because we are so in love with each other it’s as if we are the only two people on earth. People see the love we share and believe that that kind of love is reserved for people who are dating or just got married. That is a myth and a lie from the enemy who wants to destroy marriage and what it stands for. Marriage is supposed to get better the longer you’re together and God has blessed us with that kind of relationship and now we want to share what God has done for us with you.
We are praying for you everyday,
Keven & Marianne
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